A List Of Complaints Whiskey Wednesday

Picture whiskey here.
I’m leaving it blank since there is no whiskey here. None. Nada.
Let me explain.
I think I’ve told you all about Not My Kid (NMK) and his mother and the step-father a little bit. Right before Thanksgiving, they fell on hard times and struggled through the holidays. Finally, they came to stay with us. Now, lest you think I’m a ministering angel, don’t. I’m sure as Hell not gracious about it. I’ve been in a permanent state of “bitch” since the move in. I’ve hid it fairly well.
But I’ve got to list the little bitchy things or I’ll explode!
Let me just say that addiction sucks. Step Dad isn’t ready to let go of alcohol. NMK’s Mom isn’t ready to let go of Step Dad. They fight. ALL. THE. TIME.
She eats Tricks. The cereal.
She sleeps all day.
He goes in and out the door. Have I mentioned my psycho dog that barks at EVERYONE whenever they come in and out of the door? Yeah. A bit disruptive.
One morning, she actually complained that I was on the computer too much.
That’s right.
I’m on the computer too much promoting my books, filling out contracts and writing books that I receive royalty checks for.
I’m a horrible person.
Let’s just say that there’s a bit too much togetherness for my taste. Poor Demolition Boy. He’s struggling. As his teacher says, “Before the meds he was frustrated with the academic part of school. Now he’s frustrated with people.” It’s a bit difficult to tell if it’s the meds or if the added stress of adding an entire family to ours has stressed him out.
Also, the difference in parenting has been interesting.
But then, I’ve never been in the same situation and never want to be. I’m well aware that I’ve made a choice and these are the consequences. I’m not saying I wish I’d never done this. On the contrary, I’ve learned some very valuable lessons.
Helping the kid means helping the adults in the kid’s life. All of them. Including the worried Great Grandma and the odd teacher or two.
Helping the adults in the kid’s life means dealing with ALL of their baggage. It’s not intentional. It just is.
Helping the adults doesn’t mean they’ll get it. It means they’ll have a warm place to fall. That’s it.
Plan for time to bitch AWAY from the house. There won’t be any privacy at home. Walls are thin.
Follow the Cub Scouts steps to Courage.
Be Brave.
Be Calm.
Be Clear.
Be Careful.
I’ve kept the whiskey out of the house because I don’t want to provide any alcohol for anyone including me.
Wish me luck.

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7 Comments

Filed under Being Philisophical, Life Stuff, Whiskey Wednesday

7 responses to “A List Of Complaints Whiskey Wednesday

  1. Aww Jen! I’m so sorry :-(. We need to crack a bottle of something smooth and hangout for a few hours. The stories we could tell ;-).

  2. Jen

    Amen sistah. I know it hasn’t been an easy time for you either.
    You know I love ya’ right? Well, I do. No matter what. Really.

  3. Oh Honey, set deadlines and limits. You may not be a “ministering angel”, but you’re an “administrating angel”.

    Sit down with them and set goals to get them OUT of your house. Say—“in three months, you have to go.” No more warm place to fall.

    First of all, channel Judge Judy into your brain.

    Give the her a list of chores she has to do every day to live in your house. I’m serious. It’s community living. Throw her ass out of bed at 8am and make her work for her keep or look for a job.

    Don’t hide the bitchy. Hang in there.

    xo

    ATM

  4. Jen

    Thanks Attilla.
    I’ve had a tough time setting some kind of deadline because they’re SO dependent on the system to get out on their own.
    Also, I am TERRIBLE at asking for help. Awful. I will say this. They’ve stepped up and bought food for the house and pretty much maintain quiet in the mornings. I said I work and that means shut up. LOL.
    Anything I’ve asked them to do, they’ve done.
    To give them both credit, I think they’re making a huge effort to pull themselves up and I don’t feel like, well, like I do with my BIL.
    She actually, through me, got a job on the weekends and is doing well.
    I do have my little issues, but it’s not all them.

  5. Kym

    Jen, I’ve been so crazed by life that I haven’t been blogging nor reading some of my favorite sites. Today, I crept back over here to get a little fix of laughter. Instead, I got filled with a warm fuzzy feeling. Thank you– even though it wasn’t what I expected, it was what I needed.

  6. I love how Atilla the Mom put it: ‘You may not be a “ministering angel”, but you’re an “administrating angel”.’

    And your point – ‘Helping the kid means helping the adults in the kid’s life. All of them. Including the worried Great Grandma and the odd teacher or two.
    Helping the adults in the kid’s life means dealing with ALL of their baggage. It’s not intentional. It just is.’ – this is what keeps so many people from even attempting to help out in a situation like this.

    Once again, I applaud you for what you’re doing.

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