13 Songs I Listen To That Touch My Soul

I have a playlist I listen to that calms me. There’s more than 13 but here’s the top one.
1. Iowa by Dar Williams

2. Crumbs and Broken Shells by Sarah Fimm

3. Out From Under by Britney Spears

4. Your Beating Heart by Brendan James

5. Give Me Strength by Snow Patrol

6. Between by Vienna Teng

7. Coming Home by Skylar Grey

8. Not As We by Alanis Morissette

9. Careful How You Go by Kim Richey

10 Everything’s Gonna Be Good by Kim Richey

11. The Messenger by Linkin Park

12. Mercy by Alanis Morissette

13. This Woman’s Work by Kate Bush

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Review from Ali Crean for “Dark Past”

Dark Past
Go check out the fabulous review I got for “DARK PAST”. SO AWESOME!
I’m just….I’m just….

Scandal Gif 3

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Interview with Ali Crean-Making Love 101

Wow! Awesome interview HERE. Check it out. I’m always so afraid of being boring. LOL!

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Thirteen Good Things That Have Happened This Week

I’ve had some tough things going on in general, but rather than focus on them, I’m going to look at the good things.

1. The Sequel to “Wolf of Arundale Hall” has been accepted.
2. Joey W. Hill like my sort-of review of “Rough Canvas” and commented on it.
3. My crit partner got back to me on “Temptation To Submit” and I think I’ve gotten better.
My first drafts still suck suck suck, but they’re not NEARLY as bad as they used to be.
4. I finished my interview for Ali Crean
I think she’s going to review “Dark Past” too which is awesome. The questions she asked were really thought provoking and I loved answering it.
5. My boss is not here today
I like my boss, but I sure was glad to see he wasn’t here this morning. I think the stress was getting to me.
6. I get to go to an awesome event on Saturday
I had thought I was going to have to miss it, but it’s worked out so I can go. I’m totally stoked.
7. After 4 years of wrestling, Train Boy FINALLY won a gold medal
I was so proud of him.
8. I’ve already completed three manuscripts and should have them all submitted by this summer
“Marked For Love”, “Brother of Arundale” and “Temptation To Submit” are all completed and slated to be submitted to their respective publishers this year.
9. My boss is in a MUCH better mood this morning that he’s been for the last three days
10. I think there’s enough in our budget to FINALLY get our lawnmower fixed.
11. I got to go on a Kim Knox binge.
12. Train Boy was also voted into the Order of the Arrow by his Boy Scout Troop
13. I watched the entire first season of “Sleep Hollow”.
And yes, now I’m hooked. *shakes fist* Damn you Melissa Blue!!!!!

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Rough Canvas by Joey W. Hill

Rough Canvas by Joey Hill
I’m a rereader. Did you know that? I like to revisit books that haunt me, touch me in some amazing way. And I reread “Rough Canvas” by Joey W. Hill more than a lot of other books I own.
This time, as I was delving into the story again, I tried to figure out why this book speaks to me.
On the surface, the story of Marcus and Thomas seems to be about two men who struggle to love each other in the face of familial disapproval and dark secrets from the past. Deeper down, I think the story is about trust and faith in one’s self as well as the person you love.
But that isn’t why I reread it.
For me, I fall in love with Marcus Stanton over and over for one reason. He loves Thomas and he fight for Thomas’s dream, his soul. It’s that absolute commitment that Marcus has to Thomas’s gift as an artist that stabs me in the heart. Everyone needs a Marcus, that person who protects and defend the dream of the person they love. As an author, this has special meaning to me. I want that belief, that support that will hold me up when I don’t have faith in my own talent. Marcus is willing to allow his own heart to be broken into a million brittle pieces as long Thomas paints. He sees Thomas’s soul in the art that he paints. Marcus is, and always will be, the protector of Thomas’s soul even when Thomas himself doesn’t protect it.
It’s that overwhelming insistence that Marcus has that Thomas paint, that he honor the gift he was given that drives me back to this story and these characters. To be believed in, to be loved that much, it’s what I want and hope for.
Maybe it means more to me because recently, I became discouraged enough to say aloud something that had been in my brain for two years.
“Maybe I should just quit writing.”
And I said them to the one person who I thought would agree with me. After all, my husband bears the burden of a writer’s quirks and frustrations, the business confusion and the constant distraction. But he, in true Marcus form, frowned at me and told me that I should never let money and life get in the way of writing. I’ve often despaired that my husband doesn’t support my writing. And sure, there’s tons of times he looks at me like I’m an alien with tentacles, but he recognizes the same thing that Marcus saw in Thomas.
I have to write.
The thing I love about “Rough Canvas” is that there’s an element of spiritual connection-family, sex, dreams-all these factors of the characters Thomas and Marcus that combine to create a canvas of its own.
I could read the epilogue again and again. To discover love, to hold another’s soul and cherish it, to forgive and face the future together, that’s what having a relationship is all about.
And yeah, it’s hard to hang onto in the face of mortgages, health issues, teenagers and taxes, but that’s why books like this one exist in my opinion. They serve as markers, reminders of the true connection that can exist between two human beings.
The connection is everything.

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I Believe……

WATCH THIS!
I believe if I knew where I was going I’d lose my way
I believe that the words that he told you are not your grave
I know that we are not the weight of all our memories
I believe in the things that I am afraid to say
Hold on
Hold on
I believe in the lost possibilities you can’t see
And I believe that the darkness
Reminds us where light can be
I know that your heart is still beating beating darling
I believe that you fell so you would land next to me
Hold on
Hold on
‘Cause I have been where you are before
And I have felt the pain of losing who you are
And I have died so many times
But I am still alive

I believe that tomorrow is stronger than yesterday
And I believe that your head is the only thing in your way
I wish that you could see your scars turn into beauty
I believe that today its okay to be not okay
Hold on
Hold on
‘Cause I have been where you are before
And I have felt the pain of losing who you are
And I have died so many times
But I am still alive

This is not the end of me
This is the beginning

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13 Things In My Purse

Or as my children like to call it “The Marianas Trench”.

1. Breath Mints
2. My wallet
3. Health Insurance cards
4. Wrestling wipes
Anti bacterial stuff.
5. A polished rock
I have no idea why.
6. A digital camera
7. My inhaler
8. Hair ties
9. Relay For Life pins
From the kick off meeting. I never took them out. LOL!
10. Envelope with tax receipts
11. A Tide stain remover stick
12. A purple sharpie
13. Electrical Tape

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